I’m Bleeding Byatch!

The reason for this blog is an, “I’m bleeding bitch moment.” I just had in the office. My long term blog readers will remember my Senegal trip where I was period-ing all over the gaff. If you don’t know click HERE. On the nine hour trip from Gambia to Senegal I wanted to take a toilet break and Jacob kept telling me to “hold it,” forcing me to have to declare, “I can’t hold it, I’m bleeding bitch!”

So today I came on my period at work. I didn’t even know it was coming as I don’t track it in a diary or anything. I normally get some cramps the day before and that is my warning. Today I didn’t get any warning, so the blood rush came unexpectedly not too long before midday. Ugh, so there I was suffering at work with blood soaked knickers (I know gross) and I just felt icky and disgusting so at lunchtime I went home to change my underwear, however I couldn’t make it back in the hour and so had to call with some excuse.

My excuse?

I told a colleague over the phone that I had split my trousers and went home to change my trousers, so of course I had to change my trousers too.

Blood Stain 300x300 I’m Bleeding Byatch!

What a flipping mistake!

When I came back they all wanted to make jokes about my split trousers which might have been funny if it were actually true, but it wasn’t funny and as I had a headache AND cramps I really wasn’t in the mood to laugh along with the lame jokes and sniggers. How many times can ONE person be asked how they split their trousers. JEEEZ! I said it once and then I got asked again and again? The third time I was asked I was asked,

“Oooooh! How did you do that, were you bending over?”

I simply replied,

“Something like that.”

When someone isn’t entertaining you. Just let it go.

Let my boss bring up the trouser splitting episode ONE MORE TIME and I’mma just tell her,

“I’M BLEEEEEEEEEEEDING BITCH! Oh and “MIND YA DAMN BUSINESS!” before doing some fly kicking in the teefuses.

Geez… if you ask someone something and they give you a short answer without elaboration it’s for a frickin reason… MIND YA BUSINESS!!! And if someone is clearly in a bad mood and thinks your jokes are lame then IGNORE them, as opposed to trying to tell more jokes or constantly yap yap yapping about nothing they find interesting or work related… JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ!



  1. LOL! I commend you for taking the ridicule at work and writing about it here :-) I think you’re getting enough of these funny stories to have your own show…

  2. Sometimes people just don’t get it.

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