My Life As A Teen Prostitute

Obese man stomach 300x223 My Life As A Teen ProstituteI’m sure most of us have done things in our life that we are not proud of. I’m about to share with you one of those things. So NO HATE MAIL PLEASE!

I was 17 and it was the summer of 1997. I had been working in Dolcis, a shoe shop on Oxford Street for a grand total of 8 days before I got the boot. They told me “it wasn’t working out.” When I probed further I was told that I had caused disenchantment on the shop floor. I can’t lie I did and I felt quite justified in doing so after finding out that the three white girls that were employed there (also teenagers) got paid more that all the darker hued teenage staff. And so I was escorted to my locker to collect my things and walked to the door by a security guard. THE SHAME OF IT!

So I found myself unemployed and another month and a half left of the summer holidays. Dolcis didn’t even pay me my full wage and I was back and forth there trying to fight for the 53 I was owed. In the meantime I got involved in the business of counterfeit money. I had a friend called Kemi who was seeing this guy called Tony who lived locally. He introduced us to the counterfeit money. We would buy two 20 notes from him for 5 a pop. It was easy money. Once we had collected our fake notes we would go to different cab stations, and get cabs to a pre arranged place where we would meet up and start the process again. Using the cabs to change the money was quick and easy. We could get rid of 2 20 notes in 15 minutes. I remember one time I was being greedy and I went to a chip shop to change the money. Getting a cab and paying the minimum fare was 3, chips were less than a pound and so I made 19-something rather than the 17 I would make taking a cab and paying the minimum fare.


So one day during the summer Kemi called me and asked me to go and meet a boops with her. This official definition of a boops, just in case you didn’t know what this term means is as follows: (Boops: this is the term used to describe a man who financially supports a woman but gets nothing in return.) Usually they would take you and your friends out to eat or to a club and you would spin them a sob story about having no money and they would give you some. Inevitably you could only do that a few times usually before they would get bored and fed up with you. At the time I felt justified in using these men because I felt that they shouldn’t be pursuing teenage girls at their age anyway, (they were always at least 20 years older) Its funny because I don’t know what they ever got out of the arrangement apart from lighter pockets and being ridiculed. They never got to spend time with you alone, and so they were never able to try it on.

But anyway she tells me that she has arranged for us to meet this boops. He is white. This is an anomaly, as the ones we are used to dealing with are 99 percent of the time black and Nigerian. She told me she met him at the bus stop on her way home one night and he stopped and basically tried to chat her up and so she gave him her phone number. She told me he was fat, but man she couldn’t have prepared me for the sight of this dude. He was grossly obese absolutely huge, and he couldn’t walk without a walking stick.

So we go and meet him and from the conversation they are having it doesn’t sound like he is a boops. From what it sounds like she is trying to sell as some whoring double act. I couldn’t believe my ears. He is asking her how much it costs for the both of us. So now I’m thinking WTH, and shoot her a look, as if to say, “What the hell is going on?” They are talking and she has told him that we have stuff that we need to buy and that he should give us half of the 200 that they have arranged upfront that day and that we will come and meet him again the next day. He agrees and gives her 100 there and then. I have been sitting silently the whole time in the back seat not getting involved in the conversation. Apart from the fact that I don’t know what to say, I am in shock.

She grabs the money and she reaches for the car door to exit and I follow her lead. When we get out she hands me 50 and I ask her what the hell is going on. I said to her, “He thinks that we’re prostitutes doesn’t he?” to which she replies, “Well that’s his problem, I told him I wasn’t but then on the phone he asked again and I told him that we would talk about it.” I was pissed that she didn’t tell me this before hand, but at the same time relieved at having got the money so easily and not having to see his fat ass again. So we agreed that if he called again, his phone calls would be ignored.

The next day Kemi and I meet up and she tells me that she has arranged for us to meet the fat man again for the next day to get the other half of the money. So now I comp-e-letely freak out, I am shrieking at her because number one she has broken our agreement and number two, I am not going to meet this old codger again, because now he is going to expect us to do something for the remainder of the money, and I don’t even want to have to pretend that I am a prostitute, neither do I want to rob the codge or anything of the sort. She remains remarkably poised and tells me that she has a game plan. Her game plan is that we go and meet the man but we have Tony follow us (remember him? He is the counterfeit money man.) So basically after listening to the game plan and much persuasion I agree. We are going to meet the fat old codge again and he is going to take us to a hotel. I can’t remember the name now, but it was by Baker Street, a really nice hotel.


The next day we meet him locally and he takes us to this hotel. The whole thing was really badly planned, as we hadn’t even spoke about how much we were going to ask for or how we were going to make our getaway We were truly hopeless. We get there and we start banging on about food and how hungry we are. So he ushers us towards the hotel restaurant. I remember ordering Guinea Fowl with cheese sauce. It was horrible. I have not been able to eat Guinea Fowl since. I don’t think poultry and cheese should ever mix together. I don’t know what I was thinkingugh. But anyway, back to the point. So we eat and then he asks us how much this rendezvous is going to cost him. Kemi answers immediately, 1000. His jaw drops in horror He asks how the price could have gone up so dramatically. She answers him very matter of factly. “Well it can’t be the same price for the whole night can it?” Then he mutters something about having to pay for the hotel room as well and it all being too much money. It doesn’t look like the plan is going to go ahead. Kemi then excuses herself from the table. I assume to go and rub heads with Tony about what to do next.

On her return, she tells the codge that there is no point getting a room if we aren’t staying for the whole night. She then tells him we will stick to the arranged price of the 100 on top of what he has given us already and we will go back to “our” house for an hour for the rendezvous (He thought we lived together in our own place, when in reality we both lived with our parents.) I didn’t know this at the time but she had told Tony where she was going to tell the codge we lived, so that he knew what was going on. The codge seemed relieved by this idea and we ate up and got back into his car.


When we got back into the area where we had met up earlier that day, Kemi directed him to a side road. We sat in the car and looked around for Tony but couldn’t see him. We had lost him about 10 minutes previously. Panic washed over us subsiding quickly when he drove past us within minutes and parked his car in front of the codge’s. We hadn’t planned how we were going to get the money and go, so again it was a mess. Kemi, in the front seat next to him turned and said, “Can we have the money now?” He replied, “What do you mean? I’ll give it to you in the house.” She turned at him and said in the calmest and coldest voice ever. “Look we don’t want to get ripped of so you need to pay upfront.” I didn’t think he would do it but he did, although not without protest. He said feebly, “I don’t want to get ripped off either.” Then he retrieved his wallet from his blazer pocket and handed her two crisp 50 notes. In my mind I was imaging how many fake 20′s we could buy with it Terrible I know.

Once I saw him handing over the money, I opened the car door quick time. I told him that I was going to the house to tidy up. His fat belly wobbled as he tried to sit up, “Don’t worry about that,” he said.  I quipped back, “No it’s messy, just wait here while I tidy up and make the beds.” The mention of beds clearly got him excited clearly because he didn’t protest again. As I stepped out of the car, Kemi’s phone rang and she stepped out of the car, right behind me. We stood there momentarily and then started walking forward, opened Tony’s car door in front of his and got in. Tony started the ignition and we drove off. As we drove off we looked behind and he was sitting there as we had left him, probably in a state of shock. It would have been hard for him to get out and follow us as it would take him 10 minutes to maneuvre his gut from underneath the steering wheel, and then hobbling with his walking stick wouldn’t get him far. I guess there was nothing he could do but just sit there and watch us drive away.


  1. akaBagucci says:

    Interesting tale.. thanks for stopping by….

  2. 'Lara says:

    First time here, intersting read…you girls had some liver to pull that off.

  3. lol i feel so wicked for laughing at d poor fat guy………..

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