From Roller Skating To Running From The Police

Disabled Parking Sign

The first time I was at Chris’ house chilling with a friend and then we decided we were going to go roller skating at Cascades so we went to Walmart to buy socks, as we didn’t have any. Chris parked in a disabled space, waiting for us outside (Why I do not know… I didn’t even realize at the time.) We were by the tills about to pay for the socks when we heard a policeman talking to the checkout girls about some guy that they were looking for. The police man was showing the girls somebody’s license and asking if they had seen the person. I didn’t think anything of it, until my friend whispered to me that it was Chris’ license. I thought that she must have got it wrong… after all we just left him in the car less than 20 minutes previously.

I Was Carjacked On The Way To Club 112

Champagne on Ice

It was just after Dominica’s 21st birthday and going to be her first over 21 clubbing experience in Atlanta. It was towards the end of the Semester, during exam period, but we didn’t give a fukkk we were ready to partaaay! We were going out with Chris; our Morehouse friend (well back then we didn’t know him that well as we had only met him a few weeks previously, but he was a fun loving guy and we were going out with him for about the third time in two weeks.) The club of choice was 112 on Cheshire Bridge Road. (Man I loved that place so much I still remember the name of the road) Dominica was hyped to be going, as it would have been her first time there.

Chasing A Rastaman Called Viviane

It started off with a kiddie’s party. My friend’s son’s first birthday.”1 today!” “Happy Birthday!” While I was setting the tables up I started nibbling, Marshmellows, Tortillas, Mini chocolate sponge cakes, Chocolate rice krispy cakes… Ooooh remind me of coco pops… Turns the milk chocolatey. Popcorn, Nuts, Jelly babies. Somebody please put some sellotape over my mouth! By the time the real food came I was bursting, but being the glutton that I am I managed to find room.

My First Time in Nigeria

I went to Nigeria a couple of days after Christmas 2008 with my parents. It was my first time and since my mother is Nigerian we were meant to stay with her brother in Aguda, Surulere, Lagos. It’s funny because I went to my parent’s homelands both in the same year. I went to Jamaica in May and Nigeria in December. I had been to both Africa and the Caribbean before but never Nigeria or Jamaica.Got to the airport and it was a surreal experience. My mother didn’t even recognise her own brother. (She hasn’t seen him in about 20 years) Both my mother my father were picking out all types of strangers from the crowd.

My 5 Days In Trinidad

On the day I am leaving I end up going earlier than my flight time with Jay to the airport because he told me I could go standby. BOOOO! There were no seats left and I had to wait for the next one! I had prebooked a room by telephone at La Calypso on French Street in WoodBrook under RP’s guidance. I like the area (lots of restaurants and I looooove food!), but the hotel looks like a prison. In one sense it is good because security is TIGHT, but then it leaves you wondering… why is it so tight? Did something happen there?

Under my umbrella – ella – ella – ay

My feet are all shrivelled up, like an old man’s dick, or I should say how I imagine an old man’s dick to be, since I have no experience with old dicks. It has been raining for the last two days like the world is flooding… My ass is cold and tired, even though I haven’t danced too much tonight. I went with Chrystal to a bar/club in the West End called Digress. I digress… wny is it a week until June and it’s FUH-REEZING… Why? I can’t wait to get some heat in my bones and sun on my skin… ooooooh…. weeeeee!

Suzy is a Floozy That A Nigerian Guy Will Never Marry

So on Friday “Jeem” was a bust. He said he wanted to meet but it wasn’t happening, so Ruth and I decided to go out but at the time she was braiding hair and so said she’d come around when she was done, which was meant to be around 10pm but she didn’t even get to me til past midnight… We drank Caiprinhas (I still got 3 bottles of Cachacha that I brought back from Brazil) til almost two and luckily my friend that lives nearby was around and offered to take us to Player’s Club, because I swear we were gonna walk. It looked close on the map but it would have been a trek and a half!

Dancehall Queen Mampie

So in the last blog I let you into my Nollywood groupie-ness. After the picture taking we went to another club and there was more brandy flowing (oh I love Brandy.) Apparently Jim was with a girl. I say apparently because although this chick was in the first place where we were taking pictures I didn’t really notice that they were together (my friend said that it was wishful thinking) Anyways when we rolled up at the second club she wasn’t with them. We got to the door and then *POW* there she was. I think she knew someone in the club because she was the one that was instrumental in us getting to the front of the queue and getting in the place for free.

Becoming A Nollywood Groupie

I swear I am not a muthafuckin groupie…I swear I am not! At least I never thought I could act so irrationally (ok except that one time with Ginuwine and that one time with Five) If you know me in real life then you know that I am a Nollywood fanatic (the Nigerian film industry, in case u aint know) Have been for 8 good weeks and counting. In that short space of time I know everything there is to know about every Nollywood household star. So my Sunday was off to a slow start.

Last Night In Lisbon – Hanging Out Where The Fake Rappers Beef

We had a good 5 hour sleep and decided that since it was our last night we should try and go out. But to just where on a Monday night we had no idea! I called Helder (remember him? Say Samthing LOL) since he is club head to find out where we could go. I hadn’t spoken to him since the night of the “Say Samthing” incident, but when you are battling against language barriers, there is no room for awkwardness.