I’m Bleeding Byatch!

Blood Stain

The reason for this blog is an, “I’m bleeding bitch moment.” I just had in the office. My long term blog readers will remember my Senegal trip where I was period-ing all over the gaff. If you don’t know click HERE. On the nine hour trip from Gambia to Senegal I wanted to take a toilet break and Jacob kept telling me to “hold it,” forcing me to have to declare, “I can’t hold it, I’m bleeding bitch!” So today I came on my period at work. I didn’t even know it was coming as I don’t track it in a diary or anything.

Skiving Off Work And Random Spontaneity

Do you have a “fuck you!” that you want to say to someone but can’t? Come and say it here. I wrote this when I was at work pissed off as hell. Let me give a bit of background. I word in an educational establishment giving advice. On this day I was posted to another site. When I got there no one knew where I was supposed to be and there were NO materials whatsoever for me to use and no one seemed to know a thing. I work with the biggest bunch of losers to ever walk the face of this planet. If I dared I would gob in the faces of 90 percent of you scumbags.

Titty Woman AKA Jesus’ Wife Returns

Titty woman AKA Jesus’ wife came lumbering into the office today with her big heavy footed elephant steps. One minute there were three of us working in the office and the next minute I was alone with TITTY WOMAN. Maaaaan that byatch can talk… yakkkkking ooooon and on about nothing. She comes in here all the freaking time but has never enrolled on anything. She didn’t have the wig on this time. She just rolled in bald headed, eyes glazed and black lipped like she’d been hittin a pipe all day.

Insects Are Only Good For Crushing

Today at work there was this cock-a-roach looking flying thing that was hovering about, which ended up dilly dallying about in the plastic thing that encases the fluorescent light that hums above my head. It then started making a nuisance of itself by hanging on the window sill. The temp was saying that the animal was on the sill, so I said to him, “What the hell are you waiting for? KILL IT!” He said, that no he can’t do that. What in the hell? What is wrong with people?

The Numbskull IT Guy At My Workplace

This motherfucker always has some comment to make about my weight. I don’t even know him like that for him to approach me in such a manner. We aren’t friends and I don’t banter with him or anything. I rarely even say hello when I see him in the corridors. I might simply acknowledge his presence with a slight nod.

Some Of The Characters I Meet Every Day – The Bobby Brown Remix

This bitch ass in a faded grey cheap looking too big suit with a Bobby Brown circa 1990 haircut (you know the lean?) approaches my desk and the first words that he barks at me are, “I’m a veeeery busy man.” Yeah so fuckin what? I was wondering why he was telling me… I’m not your friend or wife, or even aquaintance. I could give a fuck… but I don’t…

My Fears About Colonic Irrigation

I have five weeks exactly before I leave and my clothes don’t fit. What the hell am I gonna do? I thought that buying everything too small would give me the incentive to get into them. Looks like I’m going to be going halfway across the world with an empty suitcase. I think the only hope now is starvation, but temptation is all around me. To top it all of I went boozing. It’s not my fault! It’s all in an effort to be social. The only other thing I could think of that might help (apart from a gruelling exercise regime and starvation) is colonic irrigation/hydrotherapy. So I booked myself in to get it done after work TODAY. If this doesn’t at least flatten my stomach I’m DOOMED!

The Sign In Front Of The Building Requests That You Do Not Spit

So on Monday morning I came into work and there was a sign with a stand (it’s own 5 foot tall stand, can you imagine?) put up in front of the main door that said, “Anyone bringing drugs into the college will be suspended.” Note the fact that it says suspended. Doesn’t that mean that you get a day or two off and then you come back happy as Larry like nothing has happened? The sign should say EXPELLED. Well it should say that if I was to approve of such a sign, but for the record I don’t.

Jesus' Wife Came To Holla At Me With A Red Weave And Pink Plastic Shoes

I saw her big face peering through the window, and didn’t recognise her immediately as she was wearing a huuuuuge red weave and pink ensemble. As soon as she caught sight of me she immediately began waving her grubby oversized mitts at me and bellowed through the door, “Allo darlin’!”

You Birthed The Spawn Of Satan So Deal With It

This lady comes in to fill in an application form. She comes in with two kids. One is about 9, I’d say and the other about 5. She sits down at a table and starts filling an application form and puts the two boys on some other chairs nearby. She has her back to them. The littlest one is a terror. First he opens one of the doors and starts running down the corridor. The woman just turns and glares at the oldest one. Its a glare that she probably gives him every day. He knows what it means and he shoots after the little one. Taking hold of him forcibly as the terror is screaming and wailing at not being able to run free.