The Agent For The Brazilian Apartment Is An Alcoholic Bisexual Crackhead

Salvador 300x225 The Agent For The Brazilian Apartment Is An Alcoholic Bisexual CrackheadThe agent that we booked the apartment from is an alcoholic bisexual crackhead. When I see him on the street he is constantly trying to touch me.


While I am typing this the crazy agent motherfucker walks into the internet cafe, asks me how I am doing. I want to say,

“I would be fine if the back of a cupboard didn’t double as the apartment wall. I would also be fine if there was not a blocked toilet and two broken beds that were clearly picked up from a skip.”

Diego, the guy that I met last year who I suspected was on coke or sucking dicks for cash (long trips to the bathroom) is in fact doing both, plus selling the stuff to tourists. HE declares his undying love for me when he is not with his foreign girlfriends or not calling me a crazy, ugly motherfucker. His favourite phrase lately is,

“I HATE YOU ZARA… You Cwazy!”

He then found out about this guy I was hanging out with called Paulo (apparently they used to be friends)and decided to spend the day with my friends on the beach a day I wasn’t there calling Paulo a big headed ugly mother fucker.

Ill post pictures later so you can decide who has the biggest head.


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